It’s that time of year again, when we remind ourselves why we don’t drink to excess the rest of the year. Well, there was that 4th of July episode but I’m not talking about that anymore.

  Tonight I”m going to see my ex husbands band play. There are several reasons for this:

1. We get along!

2. I love to hear this band, not the other one but we won’t go there.

3. I have a crush on the harmonica player.

4. I didn’t have any other plans and eating pizza and watching Johnny Depp with three teenage girls, as fun as that sounds, makes me wish I was deaf.

  So, I need something to wear. I head to the mall with Trina and we go to the store where my darling Mo works. I tell my baby girl what we are looking for-

  ” Something sparkly, and a little naked.”

  ” Gross Mom, I’ll help Aunt Trina, you are on your own.” Brat.

  So I start looking through the racks and everything I pick my beautiful baby girl says “Not that, you’ll look like a hooker.” Maybe that’s the look I’m going for……

  She brings Trina these cute things to try on. Me, I get baggy T shirts with old lady patterns on them. I choose a really cute shirt and black leggings and am heading to the dressing room.

  Mo steps in front of me, ” Not gonna happen, Mom, I’m not letting you leave the house dressed like that.” (Wonder where she heard that?)

 ”It’s not up to you baby girl.”

 ” Mom, did you forget, I’m your ride tonight and I’m not taking you anywhere dressed like that.”

  Damn her. I bought a black tank top and I’m coming home, dressing like a hooker and wearing my trench coat so she can’t see.

  She’s not the boss of me!

Happy New Years everyone, I will be back tomorrow with resolutions!